She's invited Sir A and his slave to the party!
@ 15/08/2007 - 06:58:21Mrs D phoned me yesterday. Me and Mrs K have been invited to her wedding anniversary party, and she wanted to tell me (warn me) that she'd invited Sir A and his slave along to the party as well. The last time I'd seen either of them Mrs D was giving the naked and tied slave (female) a noisy orgasm, while being brought to squirting orgasm by Sir A. I was taking the photos.
OK, Mrs D likes parties, she's led a very social life & they are scond nature to her, but I'm more than a little puzzled by this. Mrs D wants to leave behind her adventurous sex life, indeed she has stated that she's perfectly happy with no sex - which is what she has with her husband - and yet she is bringing this couple into her life again. Not just that, but into her family. Her husband has never met these people, so why invite them to the celebration bash?
"Well, I really like them" she says. And its true, they are very nice people and she got on very well from the start, with slave especially. But it just seems incongruous and illogical to me for her to do as she is doing. I don't think she is doing it in any way to make me jealous, but I know she has sometimes done stuff the logic of which escapes me - and this is certainly one of them. Any thoughts? Are women more easily able to partition their mind / world then men, so that this seems the simple thing that Mrs D apparently believes it to be? She said some time ago that she was a lot further along the path of our separation than I am. Is this evidence of that?
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This confirms my statement in my previous comment: each time you and Mrs. D meet, you hurt each other. Stop your contacts. Why are you two so keen on messing up each other's (emotional) lives? Neither of you gain from it.
And don't come with an excuse like: "Well I still like her" or "The sex was / is great". It's over. There is no future for the two of you together.
Sorry for being so harsh, but trying to judge the situation from a distance, I see you getting yourself in trouble all the time over Mrs. D, only because you can't let go of her. But you have Curvee. Why do you try to bring back the past? It won't happen. Look to the future instead!
Has it ever occurred to you that you trying to bring back the past all the time might hurt your relationship with Curvee?? Why risk that?
As to what's going on in Mrs. D's mind, I couldn't say. She might just want to see her old friends, or she might want to start a new relationship with them - and her husband. But without you!
Please stop going back to her all the time. Don't give her so much power over your life!
And I mean well.
 | KandAmoist [Member] 2007-08-16 @ 08:42 |
I think you are probably right in just about all that you say - the problem is that I have difficulty accepting the end of the affair; that is my problem and stems largely, I think, from childhood issues of desertion / rejection (anyone who read my earlier blog knows about this).
Again you are right, although - logically - Curvee and I have very limited prospect for anything much different from what we have at the moment, there's no way I ant to hurt her, and bringing Mrs D into the equation does nothing for Curveee's peace of mind & our relationship.
I spoke with her again yesterday and she was at pains to point out that she'd had some friendly non-sex correspondence with slave, likes her and gets on well with her, and that she's inviting them to the party purely as friends.
 | phinebooty [Member] 2007-08-15 @ 11:36 |
I think Antlady has made some good points. possibly she is inviting them because subcounsciously she is hoping some fun will be had by her and them, or possibly you. she knows you still hanker after her and cant resist her so when she says to you she can live without the sex it's because you are more dependent on the sex with her than she is with you. afterall you have said she is a very sexual woman and men find her very attractive. she can have whom she wants when she wants.
It sounds more like you are uncomfortable with that couple being there while you are there with Mrs K, possibly because you are afraid something might slip out?It's her life, she can do what she wants and if you feel uncomfrotable, which i suspect you do, then say so and take precautions on the night. Unless the whole thing is slowly reeling you in in which case....i don't know what will help you. we are learn to let go in life or we get addicted to the pain we keep getting from sistuations and go back. Which do u want to be?
| KandAmoist [Member] 2007-08-16 @ 08:47 |
Again, some good points here. Part of my issue in difficulty in letting go probably relates to my hang-ups to do with infancy desertion/rejection. The 18 month old me felt that he had been abandoned by his mother, but subsequently was reassured when she re-bonded with me. Hence apparently needing to feel abandoned and then reassured in my adult sexual relationships - which is why I get a buzz out of my partner flirting with, or having sex with other people, and then coming back to me. Yes, I know that's risky, I don't seek to do it deliberately, but it is what I am driven to do.
| phinebooty [Member] 2007-08-16 @ 15:40 |
i understand about your inner fears from childhood but that is the reason why there are things like congnitive behaviour therapy...to unlearn fears and negative things from our pasts or presnt lives so we can have healthier lives. I think because you get a "buzz" sexually with the whole abandonment thing, you arent totally willing to unlearn it. yes, it's hard work and it might take time, but so long as you still use that for some form of gratification sometimes you'll never really let go of things you deem negative. but it's your life and it's really up to you. we can only give you opinions and hope you learn.
 | sidejump [Member] 2007-08-15 @ 20:28 |
well antlady and phinebooty seem to have the situation sussed. I find it totally weird, and would be very wary of going there with Mrs K.
| KandAmoist [Member] 2007-08-16 @ 09:00 |
Yes, I think its likely that we'll not spend too much time at the party - Mrs K doesn't like parties anyway, so she'll be quite happy to not stay long. However I can already see myself looking for any sign of potential "activity" between Mrs D and the others, and for my sexaul mood (jealousy + turn-on) to spoil my evening. Yes, we'll only be going for a short time.
 | antlady69 pro http://www.antmusic-forever.blog.co.uk 2007-08-19 @ 13:12 |
... and you know it's wrong, so wrong ...
But it's your decision: do you want to learn and progress into a happier life (without Mrs. D), or do you want to stand still and keep hurting yourself?
If you opt for the latter, I take it you don't want to learn and be happy...
| sidejump [Member] 2007-08-30 @ 17:16 |
has the party happened yet? you will blog about it won't you?
| KandAmoist [Member] 2007-08-30 @ 17:30 |
Its not for another week or two. Yes, I'll blog about it.
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